I WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE
First, of all, I’m sorry about the Holocaust. Really, really sorry about that. I’d also like to apologize for the fall of the Roman Empire, for Napoleon’s effectiveness, for China’s brutality and for Jimmy Carter.
I want to apologize for the Irish potato famine, and for the Irish in general. Shame on me for inflicting the world with a race of poets, scholars, monks, and cops, not to mention Brendan Brehan.
I’m sorry for the Hutus using their machetes on the Tutus. Very sorry.
I am hugely remorseful for Rasputin.
I apologize for anti-semitism, racism, …